Dark and High? Norman? Plantagenet? Whaaat? This next post is a brief breakdown of the English medieval period. Trust me--it will help in future posts.
The Dark Ages (and why we really shouldn't call them that)
The Dark Ages was a term invented by Petrarch in the 1330s, designating the "gap" between the fall of the Roman Empire to the Renaissance (or more precisely, the 13oos Italian renaissance, since Petrarch didn't like to think of himself as uncultured and unenlightened). He cast the previous centuries in a poor, "dark" light so as to make the current times by comparison seem great and wonderful and advanced and sunshiny.
In the 19th century, scholars really liked this term, but boiled it down to about 475-800 or 410-1000 CE, depending on what part of Europe you were talking about. Basically, from the fall of the Roman Empire to when kingdoms started picking up again and structuring things so that there were more urban centers.
The problem is, those kingdoms were already in place under the Roman Empire. The Empire was just way too big to not have local governments keeping things in check. Those kings just owed fealty and taxes to the bigwigs in Rome. Plus, those centuries really weren't as lawless as Petrarch and his followers painted them--they just wanted to make themselves look good by comparison. So modern scholars toss out the term altogether. Instead, the period between the fall of Rome and the Renaissance (as in the Early Modern one in the 16th century) is divided into Early, Middle, and High Middle Ages.
Roman Britain (55 BCE--410 CE)
55 BCE: The Romans start trying to invade Britain. They don't get the knack of it until nearly 100 years later. Boudicca, a British queen (d. 61 CE), does a damn impressive job of fighting them off.
410 CE: The Roman Empire, collapsing rapidly, withdraws from Britain.
Early Middle Ages (5th-11th century)
Lots of fighting and trying to figure things out after Rome took away a lot of the continental connections and trade. Mid-way through, Alfred the Great starts some literacy programs. The Anglo-Saxons are the main ruling class.
5oo CE

Photo from www.earlybritishkingdoms.com/maps/500_kingdoms.html
700 CE

Photo from www.historyfiles.co.uk/FeaturesBritain/EnglandMapAD700.htm
875 CE

Photo from http://britishstudies.pbworks.com/w/page/15133669/Anglo-Saxon%20Britain
900 CE

Photo from www.historyfiles.co.uk/FeaturesBritain/EnglandMapAD900.htm
Middle Ages (the Middle of the Middle Ages, 11th-13th century)
The century dates are pretty rough. As with most everything having to do with anything, there's a lot of scholarly debate. These dates seem to be the most widely accepted.
1066: Battle of Hastings. The only date you really need to know in English history. Truly. My team won a pub trivia night with this question. Well, this date and a question about domestic cat breeds. The Battle of Hastings is important because this is the battle that started, and pretty much assured, the Norman Invasion, an event that changed the English language (and many other things) forever. Big deal. Huge.
William the Conqueror came over, defeated Harold II, and replaced nearly all of the aristocracy with French-speaking noblemen. Some argue that he introduced feudalism, but that opinion has pretty much gone by the wayside now--it was in place long before he arrived; he just made it extra-popular.
Henry II (mid-12th century): Henry and his frenemy, Archbishop Thomas Becket, have a massive, massive quarrel about Church versus State. People are exiled. Kingdom-wide interdicts are laid. Thomas loses...and in doing so, wins. Henry's halfwit knights slaughter him in Canterbury Cathedral, a move so politically stupid that you know Henry didn't plan it. Thomas is turned into one of the most popular martyrs of his time, and Henry finds himself crawling to Canterbury barefoot and receiving a ceremonial flogging. Ouch.
Spot where Thomas Becket was hacked to pieces.
High Middle Ages
Richard the Lionheart. King John (think Robin Hood). Magna Carta. Sir Thomas Malory (author of Arthurian legends, first European to write fiction in prose). The War of the Roses.
Or, in other terms:
You can also divide the medieval period by dynastic houses.
Roman (yep, same dates as before)
Not quite the Middle Ages, but still important. Just read above.
Anglo-Saxon (500-1066)
Alfred the Great. Beowulf. Some Danish rulers thrown in the mix.
Norman (1066-1154)
William the Conqueror. Lots of French. Introduction of the motte-and-bailey castle. Domesday Book (how many sheep, cows, and acres of land do you have, so I can tax the daylights out of you?).
Plantagenet (1154-1399)
Eleanor of Aquitaine marries Henry II. Her sons, including Richard the Lionheart and John Lackland, are referred to as the "Devil's Brood." Funny considering Richard is still the most popular king in English history. And that in itself is ironic, as Richard spent less than six months of his ten-year reign in England, and the rest of the time he spent driving the country into debt for the sake of his Crusade shenanigans.
With his mother no longer there to keep him in line, King John manages to lose almost the entirety of the Angevin Empire, reducing his domain from the British Isles and the majority of France to England, part of Ireland, and a sliver of Gascony. Well done. He also polishes off what little money remained after Richard's rule, plunges the country into debt, and is forced to sign the Magna Carta, starting the monarchy down the path to "symbolic role."
Lancastrians and Yorkists (1399-1485)
Lots of back-and-forths over who gets to be king. Everyone keeps switching sides, and no one knows who is supposed to be fighting whom. Finally Henry VII comes along, combines the red and white roses, starts the reign of the Tudor house, and leaves the Middle Ages behind him.

Photo from www.chichestercathedraltrust.org.uk/events/tudor-banquet/
The Tudor Rose
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